Just read through my post yesterday. Those tips were taken from my own experience and the advice that a countless number of motivated go-getters have given me. Yup, that’s what it takes. Think I’ll take my own advice and sit down and make a plan instead of writing out a lengthy blog today.

How are you spending your morning?

I am totally enamored by Craigslist. If you work from home or freelance, or you dream about becoming a freelancer, you need to be on that site. As a writer, good ole Craig has helped me find several assignments that I never would have found on anything as huge as Monster or Hot Jobs. (In fact, I have to offer my official, professional opinion on those sites: they suck.)  Now that I’ve been getting on Craigslist every morning, I’m making it happen. Being a full-time freelance writer seems much more feasible. 

In the process, I’ve figured out a few truths that can (I hope) help anyone that wants to start working for themselves from home. 

1. Get Off Your Ass – If you have a dream, quit complaining and stressing and talking yourself out of it. You can talk about it till you’re blue in the face, but only action makes it a reality. Nuff said.

2. Build a Resume – Whatever you plan on doing, you need experience to show potential clients before you can even consider quitting your full-time gig. Consider taking on side jobs at night, or even volunteering for a non-profit to get that experience.

3. Check Craigslist — New opportunities come up daily, so check back a few times a week and respond immediately if you see anything that’s a fit.

4. Biz Cards — Get yourself some decent business cards with your personal contact info on it. That way, if you meet a potential client at Starbucks, you don’t have to give them a card from your current employer, which puts you at risk of being both unprofessional and getting busted by your current boss. Try Vistaprint, which has cards for less than $10.

5. Be Purposeful — Your dreams of working from home or being your own boss won’t happen if you just sit around and think about them. Write down your goals, write down your timeline, and map out some steps you need to take to get there. Keep that list handy and review it daily to help keep yourself on target. Try to do at least one thing every single day to bring you closer to your goals.

Good luck!

I need a plan.  I’ve been virtually ineffective as far as my writing goes because I didn’t know really WHEN to do it.  In the morning?  My brain isn’t really functional, is it?  During my lunch hour?  My job is writing–not sure I want to write during my break — and I’d feel funny writing my own stuff at work (seems risky).  And while writing at night seems like a viable option — I’m just too tired and unmotivated after a full day of work and family. 

So now what?  I figure my days need to include the following (beyond the obvious work, etc.):

1. spend time with my family

2. work out a few days each week

3. write every single day

Here’s what I know. 

• I won’t work out at night.  It just won’t happen.  That leaves morning–which feels great… when it’s over.  Or at lunch.  The latter is actually pretty appealing because I get to break up my day and it’s pretty hard to indulge in bad treats when you just spent half an hour on a treadmill. 
• We’ve already established that I won’t write at night.  That really needs to be family time, unwind time. 

So that leaves morning.  The 20-year-old in me is screaming — NO!  NOT THE MORNING!  I’M SO NOT A MORNING PERSON.  But the adult — the one with the dream who’d like to actually give it a shot — says that’s really the only option.  There will be a certain pleasure in giving my personal writing the first stab at my brain each day, leaving the leftovers for my day job. 

So that’s the plan.

I have a confession:  I like watching weightloss shows.  You can’t really eat ice cream while watching people work their butts off to lose dozens of pounds.  But the real draw is in witnessing the awakening of these people.  People who have clearly made excuse after excuse over the years who are finally realizing that it’s going to take some work and sacrifice to get where they want to go.  There are always some, however, who don’t give it their all… who find new excuses… who waste a golden opportunity to achieve something they’ve wanted all their lives.   I get so frustrated watching them. 

But I find myself in that very club.  I may have lost my weight–and I’m proud of that–but I’m wasting a different golden opportunity every single day.  It’s my own reality show I call Life.  I dream of changing my lifestyle –for me and my family.  I dream of leaving the 9-to-5 world behind and writing on my terms.  I have a remarkably clear vision of what that looks like… yet I’m not really taking the steps to get there. 

What — do I think it’ll just happen? Like magic?  You can’t even win the lottery unless you buy a ticket. 

It’s funny.  I’ve gone to great lengths to figure out the plan:  how long I need to work a traditional job, what kind of deal I’d need to strike with a publisher, which bills need to be paid off, how much needs to be in savings, what personal decisions need to be made — all in order to begin the lifestyle I envision. 

But it’s sort of hard for someone to publish my books, sort of hard for lots of people to buy them, sort of hard for a big studio to buy the rights to them, and sort of hard to get contracted for the subsequent series of vast successes if I don’t actually complete and submit a book or two.

The excuses are plentiful:  I have a husband, I have a son, I have a job, the home office is a mess, the stinkin’ handyman hasn’t called back, I’m tired, there’s a weightloss show on…

A friend and colleague of mine–who’s published several books by the way–said the secret to his success was… (I waited for his trick, his recipe quite anxiously over lunch one day)… his secret was… work.  He said he set his alarm clock for 5:30 a.m., rolled out of bed and wrote for a couple hours before work every single day (and most nights, too, if I recall).  He said there were some days he was so tired that he actually wished–in those early, dark moments of the day–that he wouldn’t live to hear the damn alarm clock.  But he got up anyway.  And wrote.  Why?  If I may quote him:  “Because I was determined,” he said with an almost evil look in his eye. 

Magic indeed.

I’ve been a mom for exactly 21 months today and it’s clear that Baby Blue will forever be the center of my world.  I’m determined to have my own goals and go after my own dreams, but every decision we make must be made with him in mind.  It’s actually refreshing and helps put everything in perspective. 

For example:

We have a great condo with a pool, workout room, killer closets, granite countertops, walking distance from all things cool… but there’s no yard for Blue to play in and the effort to pack him up and take him to a park is… well–annoying– for all of us.  He’s at an age that begs for some independence and being shuffled around during these outings frustrates him.  We can’t sell right now.  Do we rent the condo out in exchange for a house with a yard?  The idea is a little daunting, but appealing — we’d sure miss the ability to walk down the street to a burger, beer, book or bag of groceries, but, we’re learning, it’s not about us anymore. 

In terms of my goals…

I am one of those moms who hates leaving her child every single day, spending 10+ hours away from him, only to come home, feed him, bathe him and put him to bed.  It’s so anticlimactic.  That’s not what I signed up for when I decided to become a mom.  But work is work.  I’m grateful to have it.  Yet I dream of one day leaving the corp world behind in favor of a more balanced lifestyle–one in which I can earn a living AND be there for my son.  And I truly believe that, for me, anyway –it’s the combo that’s best for both of us.  I don’t want to be a fulltime, stay-at-home mom.  I have friends who do, and that’s good (for them).  For me, I want the best of both worlds.  I want the freedom to spend the day with him when he needs it (or I do).  But I also want to pursue my dreams and show him what’s possible and how to make it happen.  And, let’s face it, I want to earn some dollars to put towards a lifestyle that is engaging, educational and exciting for all of us. 

Perhaps with that in mind — the idea that this isn’t some silly pursuit that is best done after the IMPORTANT stuff is attended to, that accomplishing my dreams not only sets me free, it’s good for Blue–perhaps that will give me that little push to just do it.

A good friend and I have commiserated over the years about how we have these ideas of how our lives should be unfolding, but can’t seem to make it happen like we’d like.  There are obstacles, comfort zones and unclear pathways that always seem to trip us up.  In our confusion, we often find ourselves begging the universe for “a sign” to show us the way. 

Then we laugh.

Because there are signs everywhere.  Just this week I’ve observed the following in my life/work world:

• In an effort to “fix” one of the few processes that seems to be working, my superiors have added a new duty to my job description… I’m not sure it’s the best approach, but am also aware that it’s not really open for discussion (which is unfortunate).  I was frustrated, though painfully aware that it is the reality of the corporate world–where logic and open dialogue aren’t always present.
• Later that evening, I spent an hour working on our book and a book series that I’m hoping to resubmit to agents shortly–and in that hour, my frustration vanished and my mood improved.
• I read a story about a young woman who developed the idea for “SwitchFlops” — flip flops with interchangable velcro straps.  The business will bring in $30 million this year.  While I have no shoe-design dreams, I admired her steadfast approach to making it happen.  Lesson: everyone has good ideas.  Not everyone executes them.

Tie together those three seemingly unrelated, seriously small moments in a 24-hour period and you have a pretty clear message:  I struggle in one environment, thrive in another and with a little work (or a lot) success IS possible. 

It may not be as easy as switching your flip flop look these days, but it’s NOT THAT HARD.

If you’ve just joined us, here’s a quick update:

1. I’m burned out and desperate for a new career (since 2001!) 
2. I had no clue what direction I should or could take.  
3. I became convinced that I’d grown into a fat, lazy old lady with motivation or drive left.
4. After some serious soul-searching, I realized it wasn’t a lack of motivation to change, it was the direction I had chosen. It’s hard to be motivated when your heart just isn’t in it.  
5. I finally, very recently, figured out what I want to do. It’s astounding how quickly that drive and determination comes back when the goal feels right!

OK, so now what?  

For me, figuring out the right path was the hardest part.  If you’re still not sure about what you should do with your life, I definitely recommend a visit to LiveCareer.com. They offer a free online occupational assessment that was really helpful to me. 

Now for the next steps — creating a plan and putting it into action.

One thing I knew up front: I needed a clear vision of what success looked like to be able to figure out how to make it happen. Think of it as a road trip. If my goal was just going to Florida, I’d end up wandering around the sunshine state trying to figure out what to do and wasting precious time off. But if I chose Disney World, I’d know exactly where to drive, how much the tickets cost and what time the park opens.

Same thing with a career.  I had to be specific and ask myself these questions:

• What would my life look like when I’ve “made it”? — Do I work from home or in a huge office building? Do I live where I do now, or near the beach or perhaps in a big city? How much do I earn?
• What is “success” to me? — Money? Travel? Being my own boss? Spending more time with my family? Making a difference in my community? Championing a special cause?
• Fill in the blank…If __________ happened, I’d know I’d made it! — When I was in my early 20s, I thought that if I got to visit New York for work and stay at the Marriott Marquis in Times Square, that I would have MADE IT! Boy, do ambitions change.  
• What goals do I want reach in life? — Retire and sail around the Caribbean with my husband…actually be able to retire…be able to pay for my kids’ college education…open a little bake shop in Key West, etc.

If you are struggling with this too, get a clear vision of what you want out of life and write it down. This guiding vision will help you develop a plan of attack.  More on how to do that tomorrow…

Follow the yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road… 

Love that movie!  But to be honest, I’m a little  jealous of Dorothy. Finding the right path wasn’t that easy for me.  I’ve got to give her credit for dealing with the whole witch thing…and for not freaking out when the scarecrow started talking…and I’d probably have a heart attack if flying monkeys started chasing me. But still, Dorothy had a few advantages over the rest of us:

1. The path she was destined to take couldn’t have been more clear.
2. She had a good witch and hundreds of cute little munchkins encouraging her and showing her the way.
3. Her “why” was pretty huge — the only way she could get home to Auntie Em was to take that yellow bricked path. Hanging out in Munchkinland really wasn’t an option.

My path has never been that obvious. And while I get support, my friends and family can’t help but be influenced by how it affects them. As far as her “why,” I don’t have anything as dramatic as being chased by a bad witch or never being able to see my family again if I don’t take action.

So I took a few wrong turns. I trudged along the red gravel path for several miles, but I was bored and tired of the same old scenery. I tried wandering a down the green stone path, but my heart wasn’t in it.  Somewhere along the way, I caught a glimpse of the yellow brick road.  And it’s every bit as shiny, golden and thrilling as it must have appeared to Dorothy.  

Now I just need to stick to the path, keep moving forward and hope there aren’t any witches along the way. This weekend, I put together a quick action plan to keep me focused and map out specific steps to take. I’ve got my marching orders, and now I need to make it happen.

Just wish I had some ruby slippers as a back-up.

You thought you knew what you wanted to be when you grow up. (Even at 40, you’ve still got some growing up left to do.)  But clearly it’s not working. You’re not motivated. You’d rather lie in bed reading Philippa Gregory novels than tackle that to-do list.  You sit at your computer and come up with every excuse in the book to avoid working on it.  Maybe your boss gives you that dream assignment, but all you can think is, “Ugh.” Yeah, I speak from personal experience.

Then you wake up one morning and it occurs to you, “Shit! I’ve been chasing the wrong dream!” Or maybe the epiphany doesn’t come to you that suddenly. Maybe gradually, over time you come to the realization that you’re heart just isn’t in it.

What then?  The self-doubt sets in…

“But it doesn’t make sense to give up now, I’ve already put so much into it.” — “People are going to think I’m just afraid, or that I tried and failed. Or that I’m just wishy washy and can’t make up my mind.” — “If I wasn’t able to make that work, what makes me think I’ll be able to make this dream work? ” — “What if this dream is just another misguided adventure, and I find out in a year that it was a mistake, too?” — “What if it’s not a lack of motivation and commitment? What if I’ve just gotten lazy in my old age?” — “I can’t go through this again. I need to land on something that’s going to support my family!”

I know I’m not alone in this. Have you been through this? Do you ask yourself these questions? I want to hear from you. A little solace in shared experiences.

On Sunday, my preacher told the story of a young girl playing with Play-Doh, who molded it into an angel. She asked her class what it looked like, and they all responded, “An angel!” Then she mushed it up, rolled the Play-Doh into a ball and asked her class what it looked like. They were stumped, until she told them, “It’s a hidden angel!”

I loved that story! I truly believe that we each have a purpose in life — something we were designed to do, that we are uniquely qualified for and that will enable us to make a difference in this world or in someone’s life.  God gave us all the skills we need. They may still be somewhat undeveloped and it’ll take more training, education or experience to really fine tune. But it’s all there inside of us.

I’ve heard before that Michaelangelo said he saw his masterpiece David inside the marble block. He just had to chip away everything that wasn’t David.

So what’s your hidden angel? What do you need to chip away to get down to that angel inside you — what you’re really meant to be?